By June 3, 2013

Fast and Furious 6 Movie Review (No Spoilers)

Sedagive? and I saw the latest Fast and the Furious movie last Thursday. I’ve liked Vin Diesel ever since I saw “Pitch Black” and found out he was the voice of the Iron Giant. And who doesn’t like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson? Murderous space aliens, that’s who.

We’ve had an extremely slow start to good weather this year in Minnesota (it is 48°F as I write this) so going to an unapologetically over the top summer action movie seemed just the ticket.

The Patented DrFaulken Movie Prediction System™.

For those of you who haven’t been to a movie in the theater with me yet, I have a very trusted and accurate system for judging if the film will be good or not. I follow the previews before the film. I award one point for a good trailer. I deduct one point for a trailer for a movie that I wouldn’t want to see, or runs counter to the movie’s genre. For example, if there was a romantic comedy trailer right before an action film, I’d give the movie a -1, even if the romantic comedy trailer seemed good.

Here were the trailers:

Machete Kills – Danny Trejo reprises his role as over the top Mexican swordsman Machete. Michelle Rodriguez returns, and Sophia Vergara is in the movie as well. Yes, it will be dumb. Yes, I will roll my eyes and groan. Yes, I will watch this movie. +1

Fruitvale Station – I appreciate the desire to make the manslaughter of Oscar Grant a movie, but wow I can’t imagine sitting through the entire film waiting for it to happen. A big -1, especially for showing a drama trailer during an action movie.

Lone Ranger – I’ve mentioned Johnny Depp’s role as Tonto before, and how offended I was about him playing an American Indian until it was “revealed” that he has some American Indian heritage. Despite all of that, the latest trailer for the Lone Ranger seems pretty good. If you’re the kind of person who liked Fast and Furious 6 you’ll probably like the Lone Ranger. +1

Man of Steelanother goddamn Superman movie? Didn’t they just have one a year or two ago? I’ve been avoiding everything about this movie since I don’t like Superman very much and I’m really burned out on the character. I started to sneer during the trailers and-HOLYSHITTHISTRAILERISAWESOMEWHENDOESTHEMOVIECOMEOUTDIDHEJUSTPUNCHTHROUGHAFIGHTERJET?!?!?!? +1

White House Down Jamie Foxx stars in the “other” White House is under attack film to come out this year. Given the assault on American civil rights during this administration I think the concept is timely, but I’m not super interested in seeing this movie. That being said, some of the scenes looked interested, I like Jamie Foxx a lot, and there was some humor sprinkled in there, too. White House Down looks like a silly summer action film blockbuster, so it fit in with the concept of Fast 6. +1

The Wolverine This trailer changed my mind about the movie. The original Wolverine-goes-to-Japan storyline from the comic book mini-series did not need to be adapted in any way, and I was upset that the movie heavily modified the narrative. However, this trailer made the movie look really, really good. There are a few scenes with the Silver Samurai that look great. I don’t really care for the Silver Samurai characters (especially the second one) but this movie might be good after all. +1

2 Guns – Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg star in this buddy cop action comedy. I hadn’t heard anything about this movie until I saw the trailer. I like both of these actors a lot, and the chemistry seemed very good. Bank heist + conspiracy + action comedy = +1.

RIPD – Jeff Bridges and Ryan Reynolds star in a completely stupid looking movie about dead cops who fight ghosts. I couldn’t type anything nice about this film and I murmured “what the fuck” several times during the trailer. -1

Total: 4
We really enjoyed Fast and Furious 6. Yes, there were absurd car chase scenes and impossible shooting sequences, but hey it’s a Fast and Furious movie. If you didn’t like the last film this one won’t change your mind. But if you couldn’t get enough of Paul Walker, Vin Diesel and Dwayne Johnson then you’ll love 6.

Notable moments include Vin Diesel and Dwayne Johnson teaming up to take down an absolutely enormous villain, a well-choreographed fight scene involving Tyrese Gibson and Sung Kang’s characters in a London subway system, and a death scene that sums up how a warrior expresses love in an incredibly poignant way.

We liked the Fast and the Furious 6, and are looking forward to the 7th installment of the franchise. Make sure you stick around a little bit after the end but before the credits roll.

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